Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Chosen by lot

When the early church needed to choose a replacement for Judas to make up the number of the 12 apostles they selected two with the right qualifications - with Jesus from the beginning and a witness to his resurrection. They then left the final choice to God by the mechanism of choosing by lot. This is how the process may have gone.......

Matthias is chosen by lot to replace Judas

(knock, knock, knock)
PETER ----- (afar) Come in.(door open)(afar) Oh, Barsabbas, come in. Come in.
BARSABBAS - Hello, Peter. Oh, they're all here.
PETER ----- Yes, Barsabbas I asked all eleven remaining apostles to come. And Matthias, too.
BARSABBAS - What for, Peter?
PETER ----- We're going to choose an apostle to replace Judas Iscariot.
BARSABBAS - Well, then, I'm your man. So, now I can raise people from the dead and prophecy the future, huh?
PETER ----- Not so fast, Barsabbas. We have to do this God's way.
BARSABBAS - Oh, I get it. You have to swear me in, huh? How do we do this? You want me standing up or kneeling down?
PETER ----- Ah, you don't understand. We haven't selected Judas' successor yet.
BARSABBAS - So, what's to select? I'm the best man for the job.
PETER ----- Well, Matthias is well qualified too.
BARSABBAS - I beg to differ. I have healed more lepers, I have driven out more demons, I even healed blind people. So, how is Matthias more qualified?
PETER ----- He's more humble.
BARSABBAS - Oh. Hey, I'm humble too. I'm way more humble than Matthias. In fact, I may be the most humble disciple in the bunch.
PETER ----- I'm sure. Well, let's let God choose the next apostle.
BARSABBAS - I can already tell you who he'll choose.
PETER ----- You have the gift of prophecy already?
BARSABBAS - Well, no, but...
PETER ----- Then, we'll cast lots.
BARSABBAS - Lots?! You mean throw dice?
PETER ----- Yes.
BARSABBAS - Well, that's not fair.
PETER ----- What could be more fair than casting lots?
BARSABBAS - Well, it's all luck. Do you want the BEST man or the luckiest man?
PETER ----- Don't you believe that the God who created the universe can make the dice fall the way he wants them to?
BARSABBAS - Okay, yeah, sure. Why not.
PETER ----- Alright, you cast first.
BARSABBAS - No, let Matthias cast first. I'm feeling real lucky today. (clears throat) I mean, I'm confident God will choose the best man.
PETER ----- Alright, Matthias, you cast first. (pause, dice rattle, dice tumble)Three.
BARSABBAS - Alright! I mean, gee, that's too bad. He only got a three. What a shame. Matthias is a good man.
PETER ----- Your cast, Barsabbas. (dice rattle)
BARSABBAS - Come on, mama, baby needs a new pair of shoes.
PETER ----- Excuse me?
BARSABBAS - I mean, ah, may the Lord bless my cast.(dice tumble)
PETER ----- Two.
BARSABBAS - Two?! How could I throw a two? Let me see those dice. (beat) Two. I'll be darned.
PETER ----- So, I guess the Lord has chosen Matthias as our newest apostle.
BARSABBAS - Let's cast again. Best two out of three.
PETER ----- Well, I don't...
BARSABBAS - Hey, if God chose him once, won't he chose him twice?
PETER ----- Well, alright.
BARSABBAS - I'll throw first. (blows)(dice rattle) Seven come eleven, come on, baby!(dice tumble)Ahha! Eleven! Alright!
PETER ----- Matthias, your cast.
BARSABBAS - Well, since I'm on a roll, Matthias may want to just admit defeat. (laughs nervously) Or not...
PETER ----- Matthias?(dice rattle, dice tumble)
PETER ----- Twelve.
BARSABBAS - Twelve?! Nobody's that lucky. Lemme see those dice.
PETER ----- If the Lord is involved, Barsabbas. It isn't luck.
BARSABBAS - Oh, yeah. Okay. Best three out of five?
PETER ----- (afar) Nice try.(door open, footsteps)
BARSABBAS - (fading) Wait a minute. Where are you going? What would be wrong with three out of five? How about one more roll. Winner takes all? Peter? Peter!

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